We don't go camping until the end of June...but I can't stop thinking about it.
I've learned that planning can be my downfall...because my expectations get me too hyped up, and when people don't meet the perfect picture in my head, I can fall apart.
Sooooo...I'm doing the planning that I can.
Have one campsite book, and I'm looking for one other.
I'm making a list of what I need to outfit into my camping kit: candles, spices, table cloth, cooler, xmas lights (saw that at a river camp last night, and I'm going to try it).
The hardest part is that I want to talk about it all the time, but I know it would be so boring for everyone around me.
I guess I'll just keep it to myself...and blog about it.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
Optimism
Breaking News: I feel good!
After weeks of feeling frustrated and exhausted...I feel down right optimistic!
Don't know what's gotten into me. Maybe it's the last day of school for my son. Maybe it's that sweeps is over. Maybe it's the serenity that I've been praying for. Whatever it is, I like it!
After weeks of feeling frustrated and exhausted...I feel down right optimistic!
Don't know what's gotten into me. Maybe it's the last day of school for my son. Maybe it's that sweeps is over. Maybe it's the serenity that I've been praying for. Whatever it is, I like it!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
It's the Struggle that Hurts
Breaking News: When you surrender, things tend to work out.
I woke up this morning feeling a little like I'd been run over by a truck. It's the last few days of sweeps, and the hoops that I have to jump through are just about to undo me.
I have this philosophy towards my job: bring it, every day. Sometimes I bring more to the table than others, but most of the time, I have the goal of producing the absolute best newscast I possibly can. Every. Day. But there's a prevailing attitude that we as TV news people should bring more during sweeps. Now, I don't think that your average person would be more likely to watch a newscast in May or February or November, as opposed to any other month of the year...but those are the months we try to grab you so our sales people can tell advertisers that you're watching us and not the competition.
Still, I try to do a good job day in and day out, and honestly, sweeps makes that hard to do. I've had to try and get real news into an hour long newscast filled with American Idol promotions, Glee give-away live shots and some pretty bad 3 minute long features.
And I've just about killed myself doing it.
I don't mean to whine, but I'm doing it alone. When I started in this job, there were three people working at producing the 10 O'clock News. Now there's just me...and an EP who's really a glorified AP.
I've tried to take care of myself, but I've still gotten sick. I've tried cutting down the coffee, but I still can't sleep. I've missed my kid's soccer games. I can't go home for dinner (an hour long reboot for my spirit).
Last night could have been the end (at least for my sanity). There were so many moving parts to the show that I felt so afraid it would all fall apart.
Then I said a prayer. I asked God to help me through...and for the serenity I so desperately needed. I surrendered. And it all came into focus.
I was still a little frenetic, but not as scared. It all worked out.
So it just goes to show, the pain is in the struggle...surrender and let God take over, and it all works out.
Funny how that is...
I woke up this morning feeling a little like I'd been run over by a truck. It's the last few days of sweeps, and the hoops that I have to jump through are just about to undo me.
I have this philosophy towards my job: bring it, every day. Sometimes I bring more to the table than others, but most of the time, I have the goal of producing the absolute best newscast I possibly can. Every. Day. But there's a prevailing attitude that we as TV news people should bring more during sweeps. Now, I don't think that your average person would be more likely to watch a newscast in May or February or November, as opposed to any other month of the year...but those are the months we try to grab you so our sales people can tell advertisers that you're watching us and not the competition.
Still, I try to do a good job day in and day out, and honestly, sweeps makes that hard to do. I've had to try and get real news into an hour long newscast filled with American Idol promotions, Glee give-away live shots and some pretty bad 3 minute long features.
And I've just about killed myself doing it.
I don't mean to whine, but I'm doing it alone. When I started in this job, there were three people working at producing the 10 O'clock News. Now there's just me...and an EP who's really a glorified AP.
I've tried to take care of myself, but I've still gotten sick. I've tried cutting down the coffee, but I still can't sleep. I've missed my kid's soccer games. I can't go home for dinner (an hour long reboot for my spirit).
Last night could have been the end (at least for my sanity). There were so many moving parts to the show that I felt so afraid it would all fall apart.
Then I said a prayer. I asked God to help me through...and for the serenity I so desperately needed. I surrendered. And it all came into focus.
I was still a little frenetic, but not as scared. It all worked out.
So it just goes to show, the pain is in the struggle...surrender and let God take over, and it all works out.
Funny how that is...
Monday, May 24, 2010
Wedded Bliss
Breaking News: I've been married to my husband Jeff 13 years today.
Ours is the longest relationship I've had outside of family bar none. It's kind of weird and kind of cool at the same time.
Why weird? Because, in truth, I never thought I'd get married. Jeff never thought he'd get married. And they way we came to be married goes against all rules set up by romantic love stories since time began. Not to mention 13 years is a long time...meaning, I've been around a long time...meaning, I'm getting older faster than I'd like.
Why cool? Because I can't think of any friendship or love affair that I've every had, and want it to last this long...except with Jeff. We fit better than any couple I know, now more than ever. Jeff hung in there when I lost it. I hung in there when he did. And now that I'm working a program, and getting to know better who I am and how I affect my relationships, our bond is getting stronger because of it.
I think Jeff and I work, because we don't work too much. We've learned to not sweat the small stuff...or should I say, I've learned to not sweat the small stuff. I used to get so bogged down with the way things should look. It was upsetting that I couldn't be super mom: work, have the perfectly decorated home and the perfectly dressed and behaving family. But I've come to realized that I am a super mom, not a super hero. My kid is well-adjusted, happy, caring and respectful. My house is a mess. My husband is funny, smart and loving, and he treats me with respect I see other husbands withholding from their relationships.
Bottom line: I'm lucky in a weird, good sort of way...and I'll take it.
Ours is the longest relationship I've had outside of family bar none. It's kind of weird and kind of cool at the same time.
Why weird? Because, in truth, I never thought I'd get married. Jeff never thought he'd get married. And they way we came to be married goes against all rules set up by romantic love stories since time began. Not to mention 13 years is a long time...meaning, I've been around a long time...meaning, I'm getting older faster than I'd like.
Why cool? Because I can't think of any friendship or love affair that I've every had, and want it to last this long...except with Jeff. We fit better than any couple I know, now more than ever. Jeff hung in there when I lost it. I hung in there when he did. And now that I'm working a program, and getting to know better who I am and how I affect my relationships, our bond is getting stronger because of it.
I think Jeff and I work, because we don't work too much. We've learned to not sweat the small stuff...or should I say, I've learned to not sweat the small stuff. I used to get so bogged down with the way things should look. It was upsetting that I couldn't be super mom: work, have the perfectly decorated home and the perfectly dressed and behaving family. But I've come to realized that I am a super mom, not a super hero. My kid is well-adjusted, happy, caring and respectful. My house is a mess. My husband is funny, smart and loving, and he treats me with respect I see other husbands withholding from their relationships.
Bottom line: I'm lucky in a weird, good sort of way...and I'll take it.
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